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Friday, March 25
today i have something to complain about
so today i will complain about something
i will complain about transparent bra straps today!
what is wrong with the people out there!
hello you people who wear transparent bra straps
hellllloooo we can see them perfectly fine!
contrary to popular belief they are not magic or super
what would aliens think if we had magic bra straps?
"oh theyre slipping i'll magic them back"
"they're cutting through my shoulders, i'll magic them looser"
they are certainly NOT transparent either
they are TRANSLUCENT.
therefore they should be called TRANSLUCENT BRA STRAPS!
and why do you wear these translucent bra straps which serve no purpose!
other than holding up your bra of course
AND not letting anybody see that something holding up your bra
but we can see them perfectly fine!
there they are those oh unsightly lines
shimmering in the light
supposedly TRANSSSSPARENT
ooooh, we can't see your bra straps!
let me put this to you with a bad example
imagine your husband/dying rich old man(eee) is undressing you on your wedding night
to consummate your marriage of course
you feel tired, but great, for some hot action later.
you two are making out on the bed, and you love him dearly
he starts sliding the straps of your magnificent gown off one shoulder
you feel the other strap slipping down your shoulder too
you two kiss some more and do whatever you two do
he starts licking and kissing your neck, slowly, sensuously
he's going down now, oh there he goes, you're moaning
he reaches the smooth skin of your shoulder, still kissing
then suddenly "EEEEEK!!!!!"
"WHY DID I TASTE PLASTIC? WHAT IS THIS?"
"it's a translucent bra strap honey."
"ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
oh for god's sake get yourself a strapless bra if youre big(pun) enough
if youre not big(ha ha) enough then dont start wearing strappy or strapless tops
stick to tees, tank tops, blouses, flowers whatever!
or heck just layer your clothes with a colored bra!!!
julia roberts in erin brockovich looked not bad what!
quit using these things!
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