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stressitis
Sunday, July 3
I think people these days are all too stressed. I say that after going through 8 weeks of classes in a class where almost everybody has a penis and we are in some kind of boys town or gay class or nightmare.
My class is made up of like 20 guys and 5 girls - the girls are there to do the Powerpoint slides and figure out Excel which is like the toughest program to use in the world (you need like, a degree, to use Excel! B.Sc in Microsoft Excel!) while most of the guys spend the whole day talking rubbish and playing UNO. The guys take 5 mins to look at the question, realise they don't understand a word of it, and then decide they're hungry and go down to the canteen and spend the next 2 hours eating.
I haven't really felt any stress being in the class. I'm pleased with my grades. My grades are actually like, better. And from there we can derive that when you're not stressed you actually do better. And when you think about it you realise that there's really no reason for you to be all that stressed, all that pressured, all that busy etc. What for?! WHAT FORGARJHHGDJHGSH!?!?!
If you can't complete your work its not the end of the world. If you fail a test it's not the end of the world. If you can't solve a problem it's not the end of the world. If you fail a test it's not the end of the world. If you don't get a job its not the end of the world. If you fail to balance properly and fall while standing on a rickety old bridge that crosses a pit full of hot molten lava and breathing monsters it is kinda the end of the world though. Unless your name is Jackie Chan or Gandalf or something like that. Take things slowly, but not too slowly; learn at your own pace, but if you usually take 10 years to learn something new then you better do something else; relax and you'll find a way to work things out or they'll simply work themselves out. Either that or someone else will be more stressed with the additional work he has to do because you're er, relaxing and waiting and stuff.
I shall call this condition stressitis. Stressitis is a fairly common condition that lots of people suffer. They work too much, they worry too much, they waste their brain juice for nothing, they shorten their lives!!! However, not to worry! The Kok Theory will provide a free diagnosis on whether you have stressitis. All you have to do is just scroll through the 8 pictures below. If you feel stressed or depressed after looking at any picture, you probably have stressitis and need to relax and lighten up on life.
PICTURE 1
all your answers are wrong
PICTURE 2
you, a guy, don't know the answer to this question.
PICTURE 3
you fail your exam.
PICTURE 4
you pass but you're still not happy and think you could have done better.
PICTURE 5
your stupid Physics teacher writes all over and vandalizes the graph you spent an hour drawing and worse, deducts marks just because she thinks you have 'too dark crosses'. bummer.
PICTURE 6
you sign in to MSN and everybody is Away or Busy.
PICTURE 7
chicken
PICTURE 8
the letter C
Once again, if you feel stressed or depressed after looking at any of the 8 pictures, you have stressitis and need to relax and lighten up on life! It's not the end of the world! There's no need to be so stressed! If you still feel comfortably relaxed, good! Stay happy and stress free!
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